“I’ve fallen hard and there’s no one around to hear my hysterical outburst. My heart is pounding, looking for a way to escape from my body because the pain has become too much to endure. Tears stream from my eyes and mucus runs from my nose but I only have two hands that can’t keep up with the wiping. My lungs are fighting for breath but I wish I could just stop breathing.
I think this is me giving up. With a dream too far away to reach and any hopes have been shattered like a crystal glass. Hope is a beautiful thing but once it’s broken, it splinters into too many pieces to put back together. Don’t get too close to the broken pieces because every piece hurts, reminding me of the hope that once was.
With a hollow, empty stare my reflection mocks me in the glass window. Transparent, almost invisible just like me in this world. I see the first fold at the corner of my eyes and I feel the weight of my 30years crash down on me. My first wrinkle as a reminder of the hardships I’ve been through. Another tear slides across my cheek as I accept my fate and clench my jaw, biting against the emotional torture, fighting for control once more…”
Written by Ling Lee (16/10/13)
One day when you look into the mirror and suddenly see all that is real. Wishing to turn back the years only to make the same mistakes all over again. I see laughter and smiles all outside of my reach. It hurts that much more to see it but not have it. Life means nothing without happiness.