Trying to Drown: Story Extract

“I thought I was stronger. Everything I have fought for in this life means absolutely nothing when my last reason to smile has vanished. Faced with uncertainty from the bad choices I have made, I drag my beat up body across the border. The line that divides the heavens and the earth.

The first thing that hits me is the sheer coldness of the water seeping into my shoes and spreading from my toes to my ankles, creeping up my shins right up to my knees. I keep pushing forward as a wave pushes me back, it feels like my spirit has already rushed on without me. My instincts urge me to turn and head for land, but my mind is stronger as I struggle to stay upright, pushing on deeper. Broken shells crunch under my feet, tears roll down my cheeks, dripping into the water as I stride with purpose behind every step. Slipping on a slimy patch of undergrowth I lose balance. With my arms outstretched I instinctively try to break the fall. My palms splash through the water followed quickly by the rest of my defeated body. As my head submerges, survival mode kicks in. I hold my breath as my mind fights for my body to give life another chance.

My lungs scream for oxygen, desperate to inhale, I know I will drown if I breathe in. Confusion settles in as I came here to drown myself, yet in the midst of this struggle, my body is fighting for my life. A bright searing light pours through my closed eyelids and an agonising pain burns through the sides of my neck as my hands grasp at my neck and my nose. Even though I’m not inhaling I swear I can smell blood, I know if I don’t relax I will die. I was so certain that today was the last day of my life, but then my feet connect with the bottom of the sea floor. I stop panicking and kick up towards the light.

My face bursts through the water barrier back to the real world. Gasping for breath I keep batting at my neck as the burning sensation doesn’t fade away. It feels like there’s slits on both sides of my neck. I feel like I’m drowning on air whilst my mind wonders if I cut myself. I hear voices shouting in the distance as my vision fades and I collapse back under the water, face first…”

Written by Ling Lee (07/10/13)

This could be part of a new idea but I’m not sure that there’s enough of an audience for this subject. I love mermaid’s but all the mermaid books I have read are either for very young children or for 18+ adults. I was hoping to accidentally become one of my childhood favourite characters, but I wanted to keep this book for older readers 15yrs+ I want to follow through with my character’s difficult life. See what it feels like to give up on life but to then realise there’s a whole new world beyond what our eyes can see.

Categories: The Darkness, Writing Ideas | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

Post navigation

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

Create a free website or blog at

%d bloggers like this: