“Words elude me as I grasp at the letters. What is a life without enough love?
There was once so much love to give but now I feel drained and defeated. Every day feels darker than the last. My feet drag, my heart sinks, my rare smiles barely lift the corners of my mouth. Weighed down by regret and frustration, sorrow and loss, I just want to live and feel alive again.
When you know you made the biggest mistake of your life, but there’s absolutely nothing you can do to fix it, that moment feels like rock bottom. Then you realise you live with this mistake for the rest of your life, that is the moment you find that rock bottom is much deeper than what you could ever imagine.
The challenge in life is finding the one person who can drag you out of this pit. There’s been one or two who made half hearted attempts at trying to be the hero. Then they eventually realise they’re attempting mission impossible and let you fall just that little bit deeper towards the bottom.
You claw at the walls that threaten to cave in on you, you let the fear take over. One day you completely give up. You believe there’s no escape and no better future ahead…”
Written by Ling Lee (14/03/13).
I guess I’ve had a crappy day. I didn’t even realise until I looked back at the words that have just crept onto the page.
I always thought I was stronger than the one who gives up. The only thing that helps me through my days are the words that continue to escape from me. I can only try, and believe and keep working towards my goal. Hopefully one day I can hold my head up high and look through this journey of my high’s and lows of becoming a published writer.